Zombie Baby

Did I mention that the baby does a mean zombie impression? He was conceived after watching a fabulously vile zombie movie and I watched them all throughout my pregnancy. It's not surprising he growls and bites noses!

Although they don't mention it in What to Expect When You're Expecting, there is something very undead about newborns. It may sound contradictory, but babies are an awful lot like zombies. They are the raging id- they want what they want and they want it NOW. And sometimes what they want are your bodily fluids. A rooting infant, drunk on breast milk behaves a lot like a starving zombie that wants to feast on your brains. They make the same noises and very similar facial expressions, especially at three in the morning. The main difference is that with a zombie, you really need to bash its brains in with a shovel; quickly, efficiently and thoroughly. Babies, on the other hand, need to be cuddled and loved and fed all the best foods and kissed and tickled and taken to the park to play. Don't try that with a zombie.