Griffin and Stella

After an eventful Christmas with the O'Rear clan, Great Luci and the KnipPosse (pictures to follow,) Jake and I took G Dawg to meet some friends from back in tha day (McK!) at Scotty D's place in Magnolia Woods. A lovely young lady named Stella Noland was there with her parents Matt and Beth. Griffin and Stella hit it off as well as one year olds do. Basically, they sat near each other and ignored one another, despite having a lot in common, like a preference for applesauce and banging spoons on tupperware. Luckily, I caught a brief conversation on film as they used the computer keyboard to mix some grooves.

If you listen very closely, you can hear Griffin say "Yeeeaaahh." To which Stella replies "awwwriiite." Awful cute! Here she is mugging for my camera.

Griffin on the Go

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house....

I thought you might want to see Griffin's mad toddling skillz. He can handle steps (sort of) and his army crawl is skillful and speedy. Plus, the Holiday pajamas Granny Lynn picked up for him add to the charm of his wobbly little walk. Also, check out the hella cool Learning Train Station Grammy Barb found at a garage sale for $5. That's some pimp sh#&$@t!

Bouncing Babies

Dear gawd, the internet has been down at the O'Rear's and many of the Griffin Aficionados have been living in the dark, without a shining ray of Baby G to brighten their day. Just to make y'all smile again, I'm posting some super cute pictures of Grifferino bouncing along at "Bouncing Tigers" a Lindsey's inflatable paradise (for all y'all who remember Lindsey's Birthday Parties in Baton Rouge.) It was a blast and for $3.50, it was a great way to kill an hour and a half. Oh, AND Griffin was so worn out, he slept for 2 1/2 hours. Yee-ha!

Granny Lynn organized the event and a variety of Buttons and Button-related folks were in attendance- notably my cousin Alicia and her adorable little monkey, Asher, who is two years older than Griffin, almost to the date. Asher modeled all kinds of walking, talking and monkey business and G Dawg was enthralled with his mad skillz. In return, Griffin's varied diet and snack of oranges, grapes and lentils inspired Asher to eat some fruit, much to the excitement of his parents. What is it about three year olds and the "Beige" diet?

Although Griffin was too young to go inside the big bouncy toys, there was plenty of wobbly fun for him to have and Jake did an amazing job of tossing him about. I fretted over contrecoup brain injuries, but determined that Griffin was having too much fun to be too mangled. (This Mama watches too much CSI, so she knows all about petechial hemorrhages, contrecoup brain injuries and GSR- gunshot residue and Grissom-Sidle-Romance.) Halfway through my pregnancy I had to start TiVo-ing a wide variety of gruesome murder shows. Kimmie knows what I'm talking about.

Back to the Bounce- There were a lot of older kids there and I enjoyed telling the Big Boys (4-6) to go roughhouse on some other toy and be really careful around the baby. Ever since I started teaching, I LOVE telling other people's kids what to do. "Is headfirst the way we go down the slide? Please use your indoor voices, the baby is sleeping. A spork is not a toy. We need to be quiet little ninjas, or we will make the baby cry." Ooooohhh, I love making children behave! It gives me such a sense of purpose.

Christmas Birthdays

So today is MY Birthday. I'm turning thirty-one. Woo-hoo! I'm so excited I want to go back to bed. Having always been afflicted with a Christmas Birthday, I am used to the cold weather, the holiday music, the combo present and all my friends being out of town/visiting Grandma on my special day. Like Griffin, I also came early, ruining Mom's maternity leave and arrived early the Thursday before Christmas (I was only HALF as early as G Dawg, though, and didn't have to make a detour through the NICU.) As if there wasn't already enough going on this week, I had to add to the chaos by sandwiching my already maligned BDay between my darling son and this Jesus guy. At least I waited until I was thirty to throw Griffin into the mix and it coincides with Birthdays not being so cool anymore.

I may just pack up my Birthday and move it to a more pleasant season, like midsummer, since no one really cares how old I am anyway. My plan is to celebrate my Thirtieth Birthday next summer (since I was in the hospital recovering from a C Section this time last year) and perhaps fool everyone into thinking I am younger than I actually am.

Alright, enough about me. I know you all really want to hear about Griffin and how well he can use a straw!

Lest we forget...

Lest we forget how far we've come, this is Griffin one year ago today. All tubes and ties and one tiny little baby lost under all the medical devices. Not to be maudlin, but in any other time period, or many other countries, Griffin and I would have died and none of this would have been possible. Now I have an idea of what my Dad meant when he talked about his "Bonus Rounds" and he had many.

Say a little prayer to the God or Goddess of your choice for all the new babies spending their Christmas in the NICU and the parents sitting next to the isolettes, changing diapers through hand openings and moving wires to kiss their wee ones. To mark the occasion, I will delete the NICU number on my cell phone, where it has lived for this last year. I would call every night after his 3 am feeding to see how many CCs of milk he took through his GI tube. Now he's eating grapes and crackers (and leaves and tinsel,) drinking through a straw and going down stairs backwards (most of the time.)

HAPPY HOLIDAYS, Y'ALL!!!

Griffin Turns One!!!

Griffin's Baton Rouge Birthday was a huge success. The Grandmas of Griffin (GOG) really outdid themselves, making seafood chowder (shrimp, crawfish and crab- Thanks Lynn!) crab and artichoke dip (Barbara) and spinach dip in a bread bowl (Cindy's standard crowd pleaser,) among a horde of other delectable offerings. In typical Louisiana fashion, the food was delicious, vast and fattening. The weather was a balmy 76 and Louisiana was coming through for us.

Griffin was the only baby at the party, but that seemed to suit him just fine. He had the attention of his adoring Grandmothers, his Great Grandma Luci, Jake's sister Kati and my myriad of siblings. Even Uncle MJ made an appearance! Karin and Katie were celebrating with us and Aunt Sandy and Dianne brought fabulous toys for G Dawg. Again, Griffin preferred to massage his cake rather than snarfing as much as he could before Jake moved in with the kale. A highlight was Aunt Kati accidentally dropping the cake on the patio, but everyone knows Doberge doesn't have to be pretty to taste good! G Dawg didn't even notice. Plus, it wasn't like Griffin was turning five and Bob the Builder got decapitated when the cake hit the ground. (Can we build it? Uh, no.)

Something you don't think about while you're party planning for your baby's first (or much at all that first year) is yourself. Somewhere around seven the night before, I realized that I was about to celebrate my one year anniversary of being a Mama, and although I wasn't expecting a cake, it was kind of a big deal. The first Birthday of your firstborn has a special feeling because it was the day you and your partner embarked on this wild ride through parenthood. What a long, strange trip it's been. And we haven't even hit potty training yet.

Babies Were Taunted In The Making Of This Video

Call me old-fashioned, but I believe babies need frequent taunting. Like cats, babies are very silly creatures who take themselves very seriously. Therefore, it is critical to taunt them often and thoroughly, as this is the only known cure. They can be taunted with any number of ordinary household objects, such as strings, feathers, stuffed animals, rolled-up socks, kitchen utensils and sparkly party favors. It must be noted that babies, unlike cats, lack claws or pointy teeth and often enjoy being taunted.

I also fully support humans under the age of three being dressed in ridiculous outfits for the amusement of their parents. Although, I think that such silliness must go both ways and you may just have to let them dress like pirates and mermaids to go to the grocery store.

First Big Boy Carseat

This is what the TrueFit Convertible Carseat in Chocolate looks like with a hella cute baby wearing Halloween pajamas in it. We're not actually in the car, mind you, we're in Griffin's room at six in the morning pretending we're going somewhere but really we're not because it's too f%@#$!ng early and nothing's open and we should be sleeping only we're not. At least he was handsome and in a good mood. The GOGs (Grandmothers of Griffin- Barbara, Lynn and Cindy) gave it to us for his Birthday and we can't wait to install it once Jake finishes his PhD in car seat installation and passes his Boards. I think I'd rather perform open heart surgery in a closet, in the dark, than install a carseat. The directions are worse than IKEA and if you screw it up your baby is in horrible peril. (I am refraining from hyperbole here because the thought is entirely too awful.) Anyway, props to the GOGs and to Aunt Kimmie for suggesting the functional, yet attractive, carseat.

Now I have to run and see if my friend Jessica wins Survivor. Either way she made it to the final five and that requires some effort. Geaux Sugar!

More Firsts

There are all the obvious cliche firsts- first smile, first steps- and then there are the sterling moments of childhood where you see the lightbulb go off over your kid's head and the thought bubble reads, "oooooohh.... this is fun!"

Baby's first date with toilet paper.

Griffin's First First Birthday Party

We celebrated Griffin's first First Birthday Party yesterday. Since G Dawg is a bi-coastal (not to be confused with bi-curious) boy, we hosted an Oakland fete Saturday afternoon. It was a veritable "Who's Who" of Bay Area Babies, notably Lilah and Trinity, and a variety of grown-ups and a dog. Griffin wowed all of the guests with his impressive toddling skills and his utter disinterest in opening presents. Check back next year to see if Little G has gotten the gift-shredding bug that seems to afflict 99.9% of all children.

At no point during the party did Griffin scream or bang his head on the floor, so I consider the event a success!

Griffin and his betrothed. They are very nonchalant about their future arranged marriage.

Griffin's frequent playdate, Trinity M. (Griffin and Lilah are in an "open betrothal" and we encourage them to have playdates with other babies.)


Ave, Sam and Lilah trucked it in to the East Bay for the occasion. Lilah smiled at Jake, nursed frequently and spit up on Andie, so I take that to mean she was having a good time.


Joell got us the cutest little cake at Whole Foods. You could tell someone was excited to get to decorate the cake with bugs, the sliced almond wings on the bees were too adorable. The cake was chocolate and the icing was cream cheese and only used natural colors. We don't want Griffin's first experience with refined sugar to be too wild. He didn't eat much cake, though, he preferred to massage a cupcake and rub the buttercream into his scalp.

Mmmmm... Pureed Chard

Did I mention that Jake is an organic babyfood guru and is incessantly pureeing any sort of leafy greens to feed to our child? And Griffin, he gobbles them up, especially when Jake is on the other end of the spoon. Sometimes, when I'm the one shoveling in the chard, he smiles charmingly at me and goes, "pppttttttttttttttttttttt."

Santa Claus is Comin' to Town

Most of our attempts to dress Griffin up and take adorable pictures of him have been thwarted. Family pictures are even worse. At least one of us looks possessed or tweaked in every picture. There's something about becoming a parent that makes you act like an absolute buffoon whenever you want your kid to smile for the f'n camera. If you don't caper about like the village idiot on acid, your kid starts crying or crawling away. One moment your darling angel is smiling beatifically but by the time you get the Nikon, he looks like a demented gargoyle or has started to cry because you stopped entertaining him to find the camera.

At least I got a cute little Santa, haulin' sled across the floor. I thought it might get you in the spirit of the holidays!

Because I am the Queen of Non-Sequiturs, I'll sign off by saying that the Mexican Jumping Beans are making way too much freaking noise, although I've learned to expect such asinine behavior from larvae.

All Apologies

Hello Griffin Aficionados,

I am truly sorry I have kept you in the dark about Griffin's latest accomplishments. He has been up to all kinds of important things like getting teeth (hella teeth) and walking around like Little Mister Walky Pants. Blogging about all of these amazing developments has been thwarted by a bunch of dumb grad school assignments, most of which are the graduate level equivalent of busy work. Please file all complaints at the following address:

University of San Francisco
Teacher Credentialing Program
2130 Fulton Street, LMR
San Francisco, CA 94117-0148